The phrase “the only child” is very well-known and abundantly used. When most people describe children in a family, you don’t usually hear the word “only” without child. How many times have you heard “only son” or “only daughter”? If you’re like me, probably not daily. In this blog, I am going to discuss what it is like being the only daughter, of two older brothers, in my family of five.

            Being the only daughter (especially the youngest) in the family has pros and cons. Some pros are shopping trips with my mom, my dad making me my favorite dinners, and having almost full authority of the remote when everyone is home (thanks mom!). The cons of being the only daughter would be constantly being compared to my older brothers, not having someone else to share clothes with, and having to live with three boys for about 17 years of my life. One area that I consider a pro and a con is my dad being more protective over me than my brothers. Now don’t get me wrong, it’s very nice having a dad like that… but some days I have to say “Dad, just let me go, I’m fine.”

           My mom enjoys having a daughter and I enjoy being HER daughter. She adores taking me out. It can be wherever, too. The mall, the grocery store, for lunch, or even a walk behind our house in the woods. She loves spending time with me. Not that she doesn’t love spending time with my brothers, but being a girl is different. It’s like she’s one of my best friends just 30 years older and has a lot more wisdom than my friends my age. Growing up, my mom and I always listened to and loved Martina McBride. McBride’s song, “In My Daughter’s Eyes”, always reminds me of her. Whenever she takes me shopping you can tell that she enjoys it more because she’s always picking out clothes for me to try on. I can talk to my mom about anything and she always knows exactly what to say. I can say that being the only daughter is great whenever I’m around my mom, and I’m so thankful for that!

       As much as my mom loves having a daughter, I think my dad loves it even more. Everyone knows that dads are protective over their daughters… but dads with only one daughter, that’s where boys need to watch out! In all seriousness, though, my dad is protective, but he also lets me embrace my independence. He may act all tough whenever he’s around the entire family and we’re talking about a potential boy in my life, but the minute he meets that boy he turns into the man he truly is; a big ‘ol teddy bear. Being his only daughter made me the independent woman I am today. He taught me that I didn’t need a boy to make me happy. He taught me that being happy was doing what I loved and being around the people who I loved. He also made me the athlete I am today by constantly drilling groundballs at me on the softball field every day in my childhood. I honestly don’t think I could stand my ground if it wasn’t for my dad. To understand my feelings toward my dad, a poem I found on Family Friend Poems explains it more.

            Now that I’ve covered my parents and I’s relationship with me being the only daughter, here’s my relationship with my brothers’. It’s that sibling love/hate relationship for sure! My brothers’ have never really shown that they’re protective over me. They’re like my dad, but they don’t even try to act tough. They just stay silent. Being their little sister has given me so many pros including getting all their hand-me-downs, becoming a better athlete, learning to stick up for myself, and being able to hangout with their cute friends (HA!) However, I did not like being compared to them. Billy was very athletic so whenever my parents made a comment about how I’m not working hard enough with my sport like Billy did, it would light a fire under my butt! Bryan was athletic too, but what I was compared to with him was grades. Bryan is a biomedical engineer, so he is SUPER smart. Whenever I would complain about a test grade my parents would say, “now Ally, you could’ve studied more for that like your brother does.” Thanks mom and dad, like I already didn’t know! Even though that got annoying, I grew up and I honestly do not think that I would be as strong of a woman if it weren’t for Billy and Bryan.

            Being the only daughter in the family can be rough at points because sometimes I feel completely at the bottom of the totem pole. Some days I just feel like I don’t have any say in anything that our family decides, which in one way I understand… Yet I don’t because I’m an adult and I’m only 16 months younger than Bryan. Besides the fact, I am beyond lucky, blessed, and thankful that I have the family and life I do. I wouldn’t want it any different (okay, maybe some more seniority here and there) but other than that, life is good.

            Whether you are the youngest of older sisters, brothers, or both, you understand what it’s like when your older siblings say “Oh don’t worry, that’s just my little sister” to their friends. If I had a dollar for every time my brothers have said that sentence, or one relating to it, I’d be rich.

            I was a nosy and curious little sister. According to https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/AnnoyingYoungerSibling “Younger sisters are usually: whiny, prone to cry, too curious, go headlong into real danger, ALWAYS have tea parties with dolls and one “real” participant, cheeky, nosy.” Some days I liked hearing that sentence, but others, not so much. In this blog I’m going to explain why those five little words filled me with happiness, but also triggered me with anger.

            My oldest brother, Billy, is seven years older than me. When he was in high school, I was still in my elementary school years. Billy had his friends over a lot throughout his high school years, probably because we had a big yard and a nice fire pit for bonfires. Being the nosy little sister that I was, I always spied on Billy and his friends by looking out my bedroom window or sneaking onto the back patio. Of course, when I’d get caught by either Billy or his friends, Billy would say, “Oh don’t worry, that’s just my little sister.” Now thinking about it, his friends probably thought that I was my mom or dad spying on them. Ha! Anyways, I got a sense of happiness whenever Billy would say that. His girl friends would always come up to me and hangout with me for a bit, so I felt like I was one of the older kids. I felt included. It made me happy because it showed me that Billy wasn’t embarrassed by me.

            On the other hand, my other brother, Bryan, is only 16 months older than I am. Being very close in age forced us to sort of hang around the same people. This didn’t start happening until high school, but even in high school there would be instances where Bryan saying those five words would irritate me because I’m not THAT much younger than him. Bryan and I were not as close in high school as we are now. In high school I was known as “Bryan’s little sister.” According to https://www.buzzfeed.com/kaylayandoli/younger-siblings, “Always being referred to as “so-and-so’s little brother/sister” is extremely irritating.” It was nice in a way, but I also just wanted to be Ally. There were times in high school where his friends would try to pursue me, and he didn’t know how to react to it, or what to think other than bringing up how I’m his little sister. That’s probably the thing that annoyed me the most because I felt like guys wouldn’t want to date me because I was “Bryan’s little sister.” (Not to mention Bryan was the quarterback and one of the smartest guys in school.)

            Even though it was frustrating hearing Bryan say those five words, I don’t want you to think that I hated hearing him say that. Now that I’ve thought about it, he was just trying to protect me and make it known that I was HIS little sister. Same with Billy, even though we were further apart in age, he wanted his friends to know that he had a 10-year-old sister. “That’s just my little sister” is now engraved in my head and I’ve learned to embrace it because in my brothers’ heads, it was their way of respecting and caring about me.

Siblings can drive you crazy, make you cry like a puppy, cause so much worry, make you scream like a maniac, and can make you the happiest human being alive. I can tell you that I have experienced all of these emotions with my two older brothers, more than one being at the same time! In this blog I am going to discuss my emotional bond with my brothers and how being the youngest has made me, in my opinion, more emotional than my brothers.

            In an article from Psychology Today, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-raise-happy-cooperative-child/201805/birth-order-and-the-third-child, birth order specialist Meri Wallace talks about the specific characteristics of the youngest child. Wallace finds that the youngest child is constantly searching for attention since parents tend to focus more on the older siblings’ new encounters and activities that they become involved in. She states, “She may become a great jokester or the entertainer of the family to draw attention to herself… the youngest may become a screamer, or engage in negative behaviors to keep the family focused on her.” Wallace also points out how older siblings may reject the youngest child, causing the youngest to feel left out. Since the youngest feels left out, Wallace also states that the youngest is competitive since he/she must constantly keep up with his/her older siblings. After reading this article, I realized that I did seek attention in my younger years, I did feel left out at some points in my life, and it’s obvious that I am a very competitive person!

            Everyone has emotions. I sometimes question if my brothers have any emotion because they are better at hiding it than I am. (Of course, they are men and it is stereotypical that men hide their emotions more than females.) My brothers don’t like to show if they are sad. They will no doubt show you that they are happy or mad but whenever they are feeling down, you best believe that they are trying their hardest to hide it. Me on the other hand, any emotion I have is shown. It’s given if I am upset, annoyed, irritated, happy, excited, anxious, you name it. I am AWFUL at hiding my emotions and I honestly think it is because I’m the youngest in the family and at some points I felt left out or wasn’t being given enough attention, so I would show how I felt.

            One example of how I do not hide my emotions well is when I was about 10 years old and my brother broke his arm playing baseball. I felt so bad for him and wanted to be there for him through his rehab. However, once I saw how much attention he was getting, I got jealous. My parents were constantly asking him how he was doing, giving him sweet treats, just basically waiting on him hand and foot. I didn’t like that. I wanted to be the center of attention and in the spotlight, so any time I fell, or something hurt after a practice or just playing around, I would tell my mom that I thought that I tore, sprained, or broke something. About two months later once my brother could finally play baseball again, we were in Cooperstown, N.Y. at one of his tournaments. I was doing cartwheels and felt a tingly sensation in my elbow. I, of course, freaked out and over exaggerated the pain, so my mom took me to a local emergency room just to find out that I had tendonitis. If that doesn’t show how overly dramatic I was, I don’t know what will. Bryan, sorry for being a jealous little sister, I just wanted the attention you were getting!

            Constantly seeking attention from your family was a hard job, which is one of the main reasons why I am such a competitive person. According to an article from themuse, https://www.themuse.com/advice/how-your-birth-order-can-impact-your-health-happiness-and-success, the youngest tends to works harder in school because of the lack of parent supervision.I was always at my brothers’ sporting events growing up and I looked up to them so much. One goal I had in life was to be just as good, or even better athletes than my brothers. (Which, in my dad’s opinion, I was the best athlete… thanks, dad!) But seriously, they set the bar high in athletics, so I was motivated to be better. Also, just everyday instances made me compete with them. I’d be riding a bike with training wheels when Bryan would be riding a four-wheeler and Billy driving a truck. I couldn’t do any flips on the trampoline when Bryan could do a front flip and Billy could do a backflip. I was jealous and I wanted to like them, if not better.

            As a result, my brothers do have emotions. I don’t want you to think that they don’t because they do. They are just better at hiding them because they didn’t grow up thinking that they weren’t getting any attention. Now going off that, my parents did give me attention, I just thought that my brothers were given more since they had more “beginnings” than I did. I thank my brothers for growing up the way they did because they motivated me to be the competitive, driven person that I am today.

If you are someone who has siblings, you are probably aware of the different stereotypes that the oldest sibling has, the middle, and the youngest. Obviously, I am the youngest child, so I fall into the youngest child category. There are many stereotypes of the youngest child, some listed in this article by The Insider, https://www.thisisinsider.com/things-youngest-siblings-know-2018-4.  However, not all the stereotypes apply to me as they might to other “babies” of the family.

            To start off, I know some people say that the youngest child is the most spoiled. My parents do not spoil my brothers and I, they make us work for what we want! Now that’s not saying that they don’t treat us with dinner or a surprise gift here and there, because they do, but we don’t get whatever we want. If I texted my parents right now and asked for a new pair of shoes they would respond saying, “Good joke sweetheart! Pick up more hours at work and you can buy that new pair of shoes yourself!” They are very sarcastic, but I love them for that.

            Back to stereotypes. One stereotype that is so relatable is that the youngest child gets all the hand-me-downs, even if you are the youngest girl of two older brothers. I can’t tell you how many sweatpants, sweatshirts, t-shirts, jeans and overalls I inherited from my brothers. I was a tomgirl for about six years of my life, always dressing to be able to play with the boys. I stopped getting my brothers clothes around middle school because that was when I started maturing into my woman body!

            Another stereotype that I fall under is the youngest can get away with more. I’ll admit it, I’ve gotten away with more things than my brothers did, and I think it’s only because I’m a girl. Being the youngest allows you to watch what your older siblings do and what they get in trouble for. I’ve watched my brothers argue with my parents about certain things, so I knew how to react in those situations if that ever happened to me. It probably also helps that I know how to make a perfect puppy face.

            Going off that stereotype, another one is that the oldest siblings will always be there to help the youngest. I can definitely relate to this as my brothers have helped me so much throughout my life. From sports, school, boys and different life situations, my brothers always guided me in the right direction and helped shape me into the individual I am today.

            There are many other stereotypes that the youngest child can fall under but the three that I just mentioned are very relevant to me. Even though I’m the stereotypical youngest child, I appreciate how my parents and brothers raised me because I wouldn’t be the woman I am today without them.

Hey there, I’m Ally! I am a native of Glenville, Pa, a small town in York County, where I grew up with my parents, two older brothers and an abundant number of animals. From growing up in the countryside, playing on my grandparents’ farm and participating in sports, I have become a strong, independent and hard-working woman, who leads by character and example.

I am currently a junior attending Millersville University in Millersville, Pa. I am pursuing a bachelor’s degree in speech communications with an option in public relations. At Millersville, I work for the athletic communications department as a student assistant, have been a member of the varsity softball team and Millersville’s student athletic advisory committee. When I graduate, I intend on getting a job in the sports communication’s world as a public relations professional for a sports team. My interest in public relations stems from my outgoing personality and my intent to maintain relationships. I enjoy creating digital media, planning events and writing.

What made me want to write a blog about being the youngest and only daughter in the family was my interest in writing about my experiences with my family. My family is the most important and number one priority in my life. I value every ,moment spent with them and now since my brothers live in two different locations across the United States, looking back on our memories makes me want to share them. Enjoy reading about my life growing up as the youngest and only daughter in the family!